So I'm in a rather melancholy mood right now. But I think it's okay, I'll survive till my mood swings again.
I figured out what my theme for new years is going to be: Love. Because of issues in the past, honestly loving someone without fear of reprisal or betrayal is something I still have yet to completely achieve. But I'm getting there :) God has led me through some incredibly tough times, and shown me a lot of things that have helped me grow this year. I think the biggest thing He has shown me is that I need to learn to cultivate and grow that love, for Him, for my family, for everyone in my life, even for myself. He needs to become first in my life, the one I give all of my love to, wholly and completely. Once I learn to do that, He will show me how to be able to love others completely and openly, without fear or expectation of return, the way it should be. Lastly, but I don't think least importantly, He is going to teach me how to love myself, not in the selfish, self-deserving way the world pushes now, but in the way of respecting myself and my life as a gift from Him, not something to be abused and destroyed for my pleasure.
I'd like to thank all of you who have read this blog even once since I started it in May as an experiment to see how many viewers I could get in a month. It has been a great tool to continue flexing my verbal creativity so it does not atrophy. It has also been a source of encouragement just knowing there are people who read and who just might be able to empathize with my worldview and ideas. We are not alone in our struggles :)
Thank you all again and I hope this new year brings new love, joy, peace, and fulfillment to your lives.
Now, LET'S PARTY!!!!!
HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!